Sunday, January 2, 2011

Getting Better

I am on night shift. It is 3:00 in the morning. Though it is officially Sunday, 1/2/11, to us who work here it is still Saturday. It's just the way it works for us. So, I will write this as if it really were Saturday.

Today, I slept. I got home from work this morning about 6:20. I wrote a blog post, visited a few of the other chastity-related blogs that I follow, and finally went to bed about 8:20. I slept fairly well, but not as good as usual. I think I was a little restless simply because of the strain between K and I. It doesn't take much strain to upset me and effect my sleep. I woke up around 1:30pm, tried to go back to sleep, and when I was not successful, I got up and took a shower, shaved, etc. By this time it was about 2:30. I sat down in the living room, turned on a movie, and settled in the recliner, hoping to go back to sleep eventually. I was just beginning to check blogs with plans to start texting K soon. The door began to rattle. In walked K. It was somewhat of a surprise. A pleasant one. She came over to me and we chatted. I soon took her into my lap and we began discussing different things about our then current "strain". Not being very comfortable sitting in the recliner, we moved to the bedroom bed. She undressed to her bra and panties. I was only wearing a robe. I took that off as we cuddled up. At this point, I only wore Hairclip. We talked more of the present distress. As we talked, I began to open up. I told K just how much she means to me. I poured out my heart, telling her, revealing to her how I really felt. In time, we had reconciliation. We both softened up and felt closeness returning. It became sweet between us. She took off her bra. I laid my head on her chest, her breasts, and relaxed in her arms. It was comforting to us both. Time ran out. It was time for me to get up and get ready for work. There was little time to spare. Before I did arise, K took me to her breasts and I nursed for a couple of minutes. Time expired, I gently announced that I must get up and get ready to leave for work. She smiled and said, "Yes, I know."

I hurriedly got ready for work. I wished out loud for coffee. K offered to make me some. I replied that there wasn't enough time. I quickly got dressed and headed out the door, kissing K goodbye. We both felt better. I wrote to her later in the night that I was happy again, warm and mushy, "feeling" in love again. She wrote back that she indeed loves me very very much, even though she isn't completely "fixed" yet. She was happy for our time together and felt much better now.

I wish I could say that all is perfect again; that we spent much time loving and making love. The whole time we were together though, we did no physical lovemaking. I did however make love to her in word, explaining all things of how she was so important to me, I "need" her, and want to make her happy. I even got around to telling her that I was sorry for hurting her feelings, and never intended to. Hmmmm.... the whole time, she did not remove her panties, neither did she remove Hairclip. I remained locked the whole time, and am locked now at work. was okay. I didn't even care that I remained locked the whole time. At the time, I wasn't even interested in getting that kind of physical. I wanted only to make her to know how much I loved her, and how important to me she is.

Locked I am. Locked I will be. How long? I don't know. Maybe unlocked Sunday. Maybe.... If I get to go and see K. It is tough to make that happen when working night shift.

I'm thankful to be locked though. I am thankful to have gotten to nurse only a couple of minutes. It was healing for us both.

I am happy.

It really is getting better.

1 comment:

  1. I'm glad to hear things are getting better. I wanted to comment on your last post but needed to sort my thoughts, and by the time I did, you'd posted again with a brighter disposition.

    Hubs and I have discovered that along with the deeper intimacy that an ANR allows, there'a also added vulnerability, so when there's hurt, the hurt seems to go deeper. I'm not sure if this is your case, but I do understand how desperate it can feel, needing to just simply heal and get back to the "happy" all the while being forced apart by disagreement.

    The beauty in a burgeoning ANR is that nature won't allow partners to ignore each other for too long. The physical need to overcome differences is overwhelming, and there's been a time or two that we've been at odds and even though at first the situation is awkward, a nusing session ends up being just what we needed. It works it's magic, and by the end we wondered what the hell our problem was to begin with!

    I assume that the chastity aspect helps the healing along as well, since you offer her even more physical proof of your devotion. ;)

    I'm enjoying your blog very much, so thanks for sharing!