Thursday, May 19, 2011

On a trip LOCKED!!!

I have been on a trip, out of town, on business for my employer. I left home Monday morning at around 10:00am. I have been knowing of this trip for about a month. I have been looking forward to it because I had the opportunity to learn a lot of information that would apply to my work within the company. At the same time, I was somewhat dreading it because I knew it would take me away from K for five days. On any trip I have been on, separated from K, I always miss her immensely. This time was to be no different. Actually, it was destined to be even worse.

K and I spent a wonderful weekend together. We had lots of loving and tenderness, lots of fun, and lots of enjoying each other's company. We nursed often, enjoying that intimacy at every opportunity. We made wonderful love Sunday morning with me having an orgasm. Monday morning, we enjoyed lovemaking all over again, culminating in an orgasm for each of us. K had informed me that I would be locked for my entire trip, since it was "only five days" and travel was totally by car; no metal detectors or scanners to negotiate. I tried to gently protest, but K would not hear of it: it was certain, I would be locked up for the entire time.

Before we parted Monday, I showed K a possibly better option for locking the chastity key in the key safe. I had purchased a small combination lock that was made so that the combination could be modified at the "locker's" desire. This could replace the keyed lock that K had previously secured the chastity key with in the safe. Now, K could keep the safe locked, but be able to tell me what the combination is in case of emergency, thereby providing a means of unlocking her dick in the time or "real" need. Previously, I would have to get a hacksaw and cut the securing hole open to open the safe when K was not available. K liked the idea, promptly programmed a combination, and locked the safe securely before leaving. I took the safe with me. Yes, the safe is very small and easily packed in luggage, being only slightly bigger than the chastity key.

I'm at this time still on the trip. I return tomorrow afternoon. I am so HORNY. On previous trips, I have been unlocked for the first few days. Then when K decided to lock me, she would tell me to lock up, lock the chastity key in the safe and wait for my next orgasm until I got home. This time, it is not so. I am locked the whole time.
Yes, five days. I know, that is not long at all for many chastity participants. For me, it is.

Five days. Yet, at this time, it is only four. I am wild with desire. I can't get out. I am secure. I am wearing Hairclip. I enjoy the frustration, the waiting, the anticipation, the tease, the uncompromising position of not being allowed ANY opportunity for orgasm. Even though I am locked most of the time anyway, all the other times, I know orgasm does not have to be more than a few hours away. Not so, for now.

I'm wild with desire!!! I want K so badly. Everything about me wants interaction with her. I want to be spanked and whipped. I want to nurse. I want her to squeeze her balls and dick. I want her to make me eat her pussy. I need her, and all her loving actions to me, those mentioned here. They all show me her love, care, and acceptance that the balls and dick do belong to her!

I've been texting K a lot on this trip. In the texting, I have been trying to educate K just how much she DOES own the dick and balls, that she has total control. I have given it to her, totally.

There has probably been over 2000 messages over the past few days. Unfortunately, most of that has scrolled off of my cell phone. The gist of it though was to tell K:

You own my dick and balls. They are yours. I want to be given to you totally in chastity, with you having ultimate control and say-so of when I am to come, or even to announce any time you particularly DON'T want me to come. I give my self totally to you, for your total pleasure. This can include anything;

It may be that you spank or whip me as long as you want, as hard as you want, as often as you want. You can tie me up so that I am not able to resist in anyway, even securing my hands, feed, neck, even balls, to something immovable so as to be certain I do not move my ass, and that I am provided to your spanking pleasure. I give my ass to you for your pleasure and purpose. Do as you wish, even if only for your pleasure alone.

It may be that you want to play with your balls and dick. You can do as you please with them. We have a modified collar that can be locked on "your" balls and provide a Ball Collar, with the availability to use a leash on them. You can do ANYTHING you like, regardless of my pleading or requests to go easy. You can pull, squeeze, or "torment" them to your heart's content. You can put me in Kali anytime you desire, and tease me to ultimate torments. If it makes you happy, then make yourself happy. I LOVE it when you giggle with glee from the pain you lovingly administer to me.

It may be that you want to prevent me from coming during sex. This may be to simply prolong sex, so that you can have as much fucking as you like, as long as you like. You can demand that I do not come, to ensure that. You can do what you need to in order to be sure it happens: pinches, slaps, pull outs,….what ever you need or want to do to make me last longer for you, just in case I am weak and can't seem to prevent my orgasm. You even have the ultimate authority to determine if I may come at all. Even after fucking as long as you want, you can, if you should so desire, deny me having an orgasm at all. (Honestly, hopefully, this won't occur very often, LOL)

It may be that you invent some other way to enjoy yourself by teasing me with pain. Very simply, if my pain, being teased mercilessly, being spanked, being denied indefinitely, or any creation of pleasure you may come up with, pleases you, makes you happy, thrills you, makes your heart smile, or benefits you in any way, then, I give myself to your hand.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

The latest

It has been busy as usual around here. After my car wreck on April 1, I spent much time looking for a replacement vehicle. I finally bought one last week. Now, K and I are planning for a vacation, somewhere in the Caribbean. Where exactly, I don't know. I read one person's blog about going to a resort and how that they enjoyed some chastity play while there, even naked, apparently in "public" at the resort. Apparently nudity was acceptable there. I wish I could remember where it was at. I would like to investigate it further.

Hey! Would it be possible to get some input here on my blog? Would there be some kind readers out there that would be to give me some guidance? Here is what we are lookng for:

We don't want the Hedonism resorts: appears to be too much partying.
We are looking for a nice romantic place to relax and enjoy each other.
As mentioned above, we don't want a party place.
We do like the idea of being able to go naked if we like, a clothing optional I guess.
We don't want a "nudist" resort because we don't want everyone nude all the time. We prefer to eat in restaruants where people are fully clothed, thank you. (HA!)
We would like upper scale dining, meaning above average, but does not have to be 5 star.
We want all inclusive.
We've considered Desire and Temptations. Reviews, as a whole, really don't look that good on them.
We simply want a NICE resort that allows for some nudity if the guest desires, with the possibility to have a little romantic risque fun, up to possibly discreet lovemaking in public.

Are there any suggestions out there?

K and I are still enjoying chastity.

I am realizing another desire. I am wanting to be tied up so that K can spank/whip my ass in any way she wants, as much as she wants, as long as she wants. I want to be tied up so that I am totally helpless to move from her spanking, totally at her disposal for her fun, totally at her mercy. Then, I want her to wear my ass out!


I haven't a clue. (smile)

Monday, April 18, 2011

Uh OH! A Doctor's Visit! And I'm LOCKED!!!

Well, things have been pretty busy around my house. A couple of weeks ago, I totaled my car. No injuries, thankfully. It is a world of hassle though. I've been driving my old gas guzzling truck (14.5 mpg). It hurts to put $45.00 worth of gas in it every two days! Yes, I do drive quite a bit. Being the case, I am spending almost all my free time car shopping. The used car market is a little depleted right now and finding what I want is difficult.

I'm single. My kids are grown. I make decent money. I'm doing okay. It is the time in my life where I can do a few things I want to do. I can have fun. I can spend money the way I want to instead of having to be totally practical all the time. I'm in my late 40s. I am due. It's my turn. I think I'll have me a little bit of a mid-life crisis. I'm going to step out there and buy me a convertible with a sporty flair! Woohoo!


It appears that having a mid-life crisis is expensive!!!!! So, I'm going to have to do it on a modified scale, I guess. I'll have fun with it though. Problem is, convertibles are not very abundant. Those that are available, are not cheap. So, I continue to look.

K and I continue to have fun though. She still keeps me locked up all the time when we are apart. Since Subbie-ism is over, I get all the loving and orgasms I desire. So does K!

Lately, K seems to be getting more and more into spanking…. MY ass that is. I had to go to a urologist last Monday to get some things checked. That prevented having my ass spanked or whipped because we didn't want the doctor to ask embarrassing questions about why there might be embarrassing bruises or marks on it. I worked last Sunday night. I went home and slept until time to get up for the doctor appointment. When I awoke, I realized that I was still locked in Hairclip! There was NO access to K and her key. I tried to text her. Maybe I could meet K on my way to the doctor and she could unlock her dick. No such luck! I got no reply. I had only two choices. One was to go to the urologist locked up in Hairclip. The other was to take matters into my own hands and unlock myself. Well…..

K and I are not into embarrassing each other: there is no appeal there for us. I have a "key safe" that a spare key is kept in, that I have access to. I have to cut the locking hole open, remove the lock and then I can have access to the key. I designed the key safe out of a couple of pieces of copper and pvc pipe fittings. It requires a heavy pair of cutters or a hacksaw to get into, but it is tamper evident. It is closed and secured with a lock that only K has the key to. If I do cut it open, there is no way I can lock it back with K's lock.

I expediently retrieve some cutters and cut the safe open. Viola! I am free. I quickly shower and get ready for my appointment. After my appointment, K finally replied to my text. She asked me what I did. I told her that I had to open the keysafe. She said it was okay and that she understood. I then had some fun! I began bragging about having some free time with her dick, that her dick and I were going to have some fun and spend some quality time together. She began to tell me all about how just because I was unlocked, it did not mean that I had freedom to do as I pleased with HER dick. I laughed and played with this for a little while. By this time, I was sitting at Starbucks drinking my favorite, waiting on an appointment with my accountant. I then confessed to her that, when I left the house, I had brought Kali with me, since there was no way to be "secure" in Hairclip, seeing as I now had that key. She was happy now. She told me to get Kali on and lock it up. I told her that I would, but if it was okay with her, I would like to finish my coffee, relaxing at Starbucks, before I jumped up to rush and put on Kali. She kindly said okay. I promised her that I would lock up before leaving Starbucks. She said that was okay, and that she wanted picture proof.

When I got ready to leave Starbucks, I went to my truck, quickly and discreetly locked Kali on, and sent K a picture of her now secure dick. Ahhhh…. it actually felt good to be secure again for K, safely locked in Kali.

As an aside, I DO like being locked in Kali. I like her weight tugging at me. I like the threat of punishment if I get too aroused. It is a constant reminder that K has control of her dick. It is so sexy! Kali is K's favorite too. She is the one who demanded that I make Kali in the first place. I had seen the KTBs on the market and had shown them to K as a laugh. Secretly I guess, I wished I had one, and that K wanted one on me. I thought it might be fun and sexy. When K saw it on the internet, she was excited. She immediately told me she wanted one, and that I needed to make her one. I was thrilled and anxious at the same time. The next day, I set out to create our Kali and the pictures below show what was the result. We have been having fun with it ever since.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Subbie-ism is over

K and I have been maintaining our Nursing and our Locking. I remain locked all of the time when we are apart. When together, it is about 50/50 locking. My promise to her for her birthday, of giving her a month of me being complete sex subbie to her, is fulfilled. Fortunately for me, K loves sex, PIV. There were very few times that I was denied sex, when she had an orgasm. When I was denied, it was interesting. I gave her an orgasm orally and then we cuddled up to sleep. I was content though, because it always involves nursing to sleep. I have told K that nursing is at least important to me as my own orgasm and sex. That is not to minimize the importance of sex and orgasm, but rather to make note of how important nursing is to me. The four week subbie gift to her was an interesting experiment.

Spanking has still been used in or lovemaking some. I do like, it must say. Sometimes it makes me horny, and other times we use it to center me, equalize me, and to help me open up my emotions and share how I feel deep, deep inside. It is an unusual way to find my inner self, hey, it works.

I have been sick the past few days and haven't had much energy for love making. Nursing continues though, thankfully.

Monday, March 28, 2011

All Is Going Well

First of all, I will update a little of the Negative Changes post. K and I did have a little talk the other night. She had read that post and was wondering what was going on in my head. I simply told her that our difficulties had caused me to question things, and although I felt I knew the answers, the questions remained as to whether others might experience what I had expressed. I explained to K that I still wanted to have chastity play as part of our lives. I was able to set her mind at ease, I believe. I did explain that the thoughts had occurred to me and since they had, I supposed I should discuss them with her. The gist of the conversation was simply that I, by my own nature, am not typically a submissive. It is fun play to add it sometimes to our relationship, but I am not easily stepped on. K even smiled one time and said something like, "Don't you think I know, I can't treat you badly and that you are not going to stand for it. You won't stand for being treated with disrespect. You have nothing to worry about." I smiled and replied that I knew that, but I still had to ask. Well….. that all turned out good.


K and I still enjoy nursing as much as possible. Most of the time this will be at least twice a day. Lately though, over the past couple of weeks or so, we have been able to squeeze in more nursing, sometimes with as much as four times in one day. We are doing this as much as possible for two basic reasons: we both LIKE it tremendously (DUH!); and we are trying to promote milk production. I expect we will possibly have a four-times-occurance today. (smile) K continues to give small amounts of milk, maybe a teaspoon per breast per session. No, it is not a lot, but for us, it is very encouraging. We are hoping for more eventually.

I have been locked most of the time lately besides when sleeping at night with K. Usually, I am not locked when K and I have been spending the whole day together. It seems to me though that recently, I have been spending more time locked. This includes having been locked more than usual, even when we are together. Most of the time, if K and I can get together during the day, it will include me being unlocked. This is to allow K to play with her dick while we nurse, mostly because when we DO get together for a few minutes, it is more for the intent of nursing rather than sexual play. I just got through with a set of night shifts at work. We were able to see each other several times regardless. Every time for those few days, I remained locked in Hairclip. It was actually kinda cool. Thinking, I am nursing, spending intimate time with K, several times in several days, and I am not unlocked at all. K would still play with her dick, enjoying how hard I would get, even in Hairclip. She would pull and squeeze my balls with her hands, or put my balls between her legs to squeeze with her knees. This is very intense for me, sometimes bordering on unbearable. K knows very well how much pressure to apply, always stopping just short of crossing the line. We both love this. She loves the way the pain she applies to her balls makes me nurse with more intensity. The more she squeezes my balls, the more I absorb into her breasts, taking her nipple deeper in my mouth, squirming, groaning, grimacing, breathing hard, jumping somewhat. Intense indeed!!!

After those nightshifts, we were very busy. Working day shift, dance lessons, attending a Friday night dance, life in general, every night that we were together, we crashed in bed, going to sleep soon after starting to nurse. In other words, we were not having any sexual fulfillment. Last night that changed, somewhat. We went to bed early enough to get in some good loving. We had lots of nursing, petting, and pleasuring each other. K became very horny and wanted an orgasm. There was one problem though. K's pussy was irritated and itchy. She had put some medicine on it and certainly, I did not need to eat it. K opted for the vibrator. I retrieved it for her and it was not long until she had an orgasm. K accepts vibrator orgasms as a viable alternative, but prefers me to give them to her orally. For this reason, her orgasm was not as powerful as usual, usual being those provided by my tongue! However afterwards, she wanted me. Inside her! YES!!!!! She pulled me on top, massaged her dick to adequate hardness and in I went. Her sounds and movements said that she enjoyed it very much. Well…..I did too! I wasn't too quick either. I lasted a little while, but when I came……WOOHOO!!! It was GOOD!!!!!!

We cuddled up and I nursed as we went to sleep, sweetly.

This morning K left for work duties before I awoke. Sweetly,she did not make me wake up to lock up. Instead, she returned a little later and locked me then. I was already awake by this time, laying in bed doing bill paying online. No, I was a good little boy, a good subbie. I did not take advantage of the situation. I considered it a wonderful courtesy that K had let me sleep undisturbed. I would not abuse that kindness by violating her trust to have an orgasm. Besides, I had just had a terrific one last night. Before and after she locked me, we enjoyed some more nursing, and then she had to go back to work.

So, this evening, I am writing this, locked in Kali.

Waiting, anticipating, K coming to my house tonight.

Can't wait!

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Negative Changes?

So, considering my Previous Post, I am thinking of negatives.

Most of us like to think of all the wonderful things we like about chastity. The things we love about it are as widely varied as the guys that participate. When I read online, I see all these thoughts conveyed. I agree. There are lots of things I like about chastity too. The thing I don't read much about is negatives; the cons of chastity.


Am I being cynical? Am I disenchanted? Am I ready to quit? No, no, and no. I have been playing the chastity game (or even lifestyle, if you will) for almost a year, with total control and lock-up since….um…..maybe eight months. I get plenty of sex. I get plenty of loving. I get plenty of all the things that are important to me, from K. She is wonderful at meeting my needs, as much as I even do try to meet hers, maybe even better. It is fun, and it is a playfulness that we both enjoy, with all of its' benefits. I don't feel a need to list them all here, right now anyway.



Now, I know that there are the generally basic detriments to wearing a chastity device: edema, discomfort, lack of orgasm (ha!), and on and on. These "detriments" can be worked out or controlled. They have remedies that any couple can resolve easily. Some even prefer these supposed detriments, which actually makes them benefits instead.

The negatives I am referring to are those of relationship and emotional bearing. I do read often where keyholders begin to learn the power of their position, and so, do change. They change into more controlling, dominating women. They enjoy their transformation and the benefits of controlling their mate's orgasms, more and more as time passes. This is all good. This is the desired affect of most couples, especially the men: it is many a man's fantasy to have a dominatrix to make them their sex slave. I confess having somewhat of a fantasy myself. It is just that though, for me, a fantasy. I am not willing to live life that way. Having play sessions, at times, would be fun though.

Okay, so I'll get to the point (wow! the applause is deafening). What happens in the long term? Do keyholders change their outlook on their mate and the relationship in bad ways sometimes? Do the women who embrace the KH position become less appreciative of their men? Do the KHs sometimes begin to look at their man as weak, strange, weird, considering them with less respect? Do they somewhere in their subconsciousness begin to feel a contempt for the man that does not stand up for himself, becoming a wimp in their eyes? Could the locking of a man's tonker (thanks Tom Allen) in a chastity device, promote such attitudes to fester in a KH until she begins to unconsciously demonstrate behaviors indicating these feelings?

They are only questions. I wonder what others have experienced. I am sure it depends on the nature of the individuals involved, of course. It also depends on the interactions of the two, the relationship development, and the mutual respect. There are probably many more factors that could influence this, I am sure. I also wonder how often the men in chastity consider the same questions. When maybe there is difficulty within the relationship, do the men wonder if maybe, because they are participating in chastity, their KH has changed some feelings for the worse, hence treating them with hurtful disrespect?

I do know that I have questioned such things myself. I do realize that all relationships hit bumps. Couples will inherently have disagreements, hurt feelings, and sorrowful times. Does chastity fix this, where these things do not happen anymore. Well, I guess it could, when the man becomes totally submissive and relinquishes complete control, decision making, and power to the KH. I really doubt that there are THAT many men who can do that though. I know that I can't! It is not in my personality; not in my makeup.

K and I have had some hard bumps at times. During that time, it was a thought. Did I address it? No. There was too much emotionally going on at the time. After we got over it, all healed up, the thoughts and questions were no longer important. These things I know:

K and I love each other very much.
We overcome ALL bumps whether hard or soft.
Difficulties actually help us to understand each other better.
We are better after the difficulties.
K does respect me and honors me as an equal in our relationship.
I respect K at least as much.
We both know that I am not weak, weird, strange, or a wimp.
Neither is K.
We have one of the most beautiful relationships of all mankind.
We are HAPPY, and happy with each other.

These things are important to us. I suppose that in the midst of hurt, during difficulty, it is easy to ask the questions to one's self. I guess I should discuss them with K. I already know the answers, but a discussion about them would be beneficial. We have touched on them a little during some good spanking sessions. I do believe that K has not adopted any such "bad" thoughts. So, why do I write this post? Good question. Hmmmmm….. obviously, K and I will have a nice little chat about this one.

I would especially love to hear comments on this particular post.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Wondering About Possible Negatives

I wonder why I never hear negatives about wearing a chastity device. Well, yes, I do read of discomfort and irritations caused by the device itself, But what I am thinking about is more along the line of dissatisfaction or disharmonies. What in the world am I talking about?!!!?

I know that there are many enjoying chastity. I also know that many of those men, are more of the submissive bent. That being the case, I can understand that the some of the men like being treated roughly, or sometimes even meanly. I read often of those who enjoy that sort of thing. Yes, but what about those of us who are NOT into humiliation? What about those of us that do not accept being dominated, demeaned, or treated badly, those of us that maintain the mutual respect and care are important and prerequisite to a solid and trusting relationship?

I am considering the effects of chastity on the man/woman dynamic of our relationship. K and I have been a very loving couple ever since we met. There were several qualities that made me fall in love with K very quickly; qualities that have always been important to me and will always be necessary.

One is touch. I am a man that loves to be touched. K did this from the very first date. We simply fell into a closeness that very night. No, it was not sex. No, our hands did not roam where some might think they shouldn't. We simply held each other. We hugged and kissed,……and touched. The way she wrapped her arms around me, the gentleness of her hands as she did caress me, the way she cuddled up to me, was all wonderful. This is what I like. This is what speaks to me, all the way down to the core of my heart.

Conversation is another quality of K. I am a talker of sorts. No, I am not one of those who must talk incessantly about anything that can pop into my mind. Rather, I really don't talk as much as most. What I mean by "I am a talker" is that when I talk, a lot of the time, it is meaningful. Now, I do lie to do my share of joking around and teasing. No, don't get me wrong. I am not a serious man with a scowl, unable to enjoy general conversation. That has its' place too. What I am really talking about is meaningful conversation. K has the ability to have intellectual and deep discussion. We have talked about many things ranging from abstract, to psychological, to emotional, to educational, to …… on and on. K can converse. She is a brilliant lady. She is well educated, having bachelors, masters, and doctorate degrees. She is actually much more formally educated that I am. I do have a good education, besides what life and experience has taught me, but no, I have no degree: I did not finish college. Regardless, I can hold my own when in and intellectual conversation. I enjoy talking with K. Because we are actually well matched in our conversational skill and intellectual depth, we can discuss anything with ease, learning from each other along the way. I must have that mental stimulation in conversation and K provides for that interaction very well.

Another is safety. Safety? Yes. Safety. I wrote in another Post about the inner child or baby of a man. That child needs to feel safe from emotional harm. Emotional safety. K''s willingness to touch, and the quality of her touch, was one of the things that evoked feelings of safety. Along with that, K being able to converse well and carefully, provided for it too. Only after a few dates, we were having a deep conversation about our pasts, our hurts, our desires, and our sensitivities. Several times K commented that she "got it", she understood how I felt and what I was trying to explain about my own heart. I was careful. I didn't want to say too much. I didn't want to reveal too much of myself. I didn't know if it was okay to open up, being that it was a new relationship and we were still learning our way with each other.

K perceived my reservations. She then held me and ever so sweetly and softly said, "You are safe, Honey." I took me aback. What! I was safe! K is very intuitive, and I was learning this. She "got it". She nailed me. One of the things I needed was safety. Safety to be who I am with her. Safety to be open to her. Safety to show her who I was on the deepest level, in the hidden inner parts of the heart: this is a place that many men will not allow anyone to see, or even know that it exists. I melted. With this simple statement, she had shown me that she understood me and was careful to handle tenderly the things I could show her about myself; as I would over time take, her on tours of those hidden places of my heart.

Those were important things to me then. Now, they are even more important. In the past, I hadn't realized just how important they were. Since I have become familiar with them, I realize that they have been labeled in my mind, giving them identity, making them tangible to my thoughts. The most important of them is safety. I can now evaluate my feelings in a new way. One of the qualities I can attribute to my emotional position is "I feel safe/I don't feel safe." This is powerful. Recognizing this gives the ability to evaluate the way I feel more easily. When I may be upset for some reason, sometimes the end result is that I realize, "I don't feel safe!" This means that I feel "shut down". I feel like I have been insulted or hurt emotionaly and am withdrawing to protect myself because of this lack of safety.

It is the classic "man response" to emotional hurt. This may often be accompanied by anger or that much despised "silent treatment". For me, I rarely get angry, in that I will become greatly agitated with the one I love. I usually keep my anger in check. I do however get quiet. I am not as conversational. I withdraw. It is not a retribution. It is simply my response from deep within. I don't feel safe. I don't feel the connection I had. I had to withdraw from my close place with the one I love because I feel attacked or injured. It is a self-protection mechanism. I hate that place. When I withdraw, I build walls. I once told K that within an instant of injury, it is possible to build a wall 100 feet high, 20 feet thick, reinforced with steel, fiberglass, kevlar, and anything else I can get my mind on, in a matter of five seconds!

Where am I going with this? Tune in later for more. Ha!

Monday, March 14, 2011

Good Things

Lots of good things happening lately for K and I!

I had to work for the past four nights. K came to my house a couple of times and I went to hers a couple. We hate nightshift because it limits our time together a lot. Friday, I had only a little time in the afternoon. The local cable company came to install new internet service and left late. K arrived at the same time he left. Problem was, I only had 25 minutes to get ready for work and spend time with K too. I hurried through my shower and K and quickly laid down on the bed. Nursing was the desire of us both. We had no time for anything else. I was still locked and there was no sense in taking it off. We cuddled up for ten minutes to nurse. It was wonderful. It is a place of peacefulness for us both. After ten minutes, I jumped up, hurriedly got ready for work and left. Rush, rush, rush.

K and I have been enjoying nursing more and more. Part of this is because she is beginning to make milk! Woohoo!!!! We are happy and excited about this. It has been one of our goals since about June of last year. K's breasts are already a nice "D" cup, but with the activity of her starting to make milk, they are seeming to fill out a little and become firmer. NICE! (huge smile) This particular afternoon, I was able to taste more milk than usual. It was evidently dripping slowly into my mouth as I nursed. I am looking forward to the day when it freely flows, squirting from her breasts as it would from a mom nursing her baby. I AM her baby after all, when held there at her breasts, cradled in her arms, nursing.

Later, K and I "talked" via texting. K had driven 30 minutes to my house and 30 minutes back to hers, all for 10 minutes of nursing. I have done the same kind of thing in order to see her too, driving a lot to see her only for a few minutes. We enjoy each other's company that much, even after over a year of being so romantically involved. It is worth it, to us. Nursing makes it even more worth it.

As I have said before, nursing is part of who we are.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Not Denied Wednesday Morning!!!

Tuesday night, we had dance lessons. K and I met at the studio and enjoyed the lesson. We have being studying ballroom for several months now. When the lesson was nearly over, K took me by the neck and jokingly said that it was one way to lead in dance. We all laughed and I commented, "I like that. I'm done with dance now. Let's go home. I've got other things in mind for that!" Everyone present laughed. Ha! If they only knew!

Earlier in the day, K has told me that she wanted an orgasm tonight. She didn't want any fireplace and wine. It has put her to sleep Monday night. None of that tonight. She wanted an orgasm and she didn't want ANYTHING to hinder that.

Arriving at K's house we got ready for bed. One of the first things to happen was K unlocked her dick. K collared and leashed me with the robe tie again and led me to bed (I love it). We nursed, loved and cuddled. And,……..

We fell asleep!

Again, we were soooo tired.

Wednesday morning, K woke me up, loving on me. She got up and let the dog out and came back to bed. She started rubbing all of me, stopping sometimes at her dick and balls. Needless to say, I got very hard. After a trip to the bathroom for urinary relief, I returned to her. I started at her neck and began kissing, moved to her breasts and nursed and soon K was pushing me to her pussy.

K was hot. K was horny. She moved me to her pussy slowly. I teased her a little by not going quickly, but rather, stopping along the way to kiss and caress. Finally, arriving at her pussy, I kissed and rubbed my cheek along the insides of her legs, and pussy lips. There is a spot that I love there on her body. It is the curve of her leg where it transitions to her pussy lips. It is a little hollowed place and presents such a sexy curve, that I love to spend time there kissing and licking. Next I moved directly to her pussy. She tasted so good and smelled wonderful. K was ready. It was not long until K had an orgasm. She later commented that it was a good one.

Being in subbie mode now for the next four weeks, I didn't know when I would get my next orgasm. After the events of Monday night, with my first deliberate denial, I didn't know if maybe K had a plan in mind for long-term denial, at least longer than I've previously experienced. Previous experiences were simply from being locked up and not able to have sex due to work schedules, and life interferences. These are not so much deliberate as they are unavoidable. Now, in subbie mode, the thought of course has occurred to me that I might not get an orgasm for four weeks, thinking that K might want to actually experience what I might be like in a longer term denial period. That is fraught with various emotions, anxiety for not being able to come for that long, happy that K would take that kind of control, wondering if it would have good effects on my demeanor, thrill of the fantasy aspects, concern that I might not like it, and on and on. Regardless, a promise is a promise. I am committed. My word is my bond. I am willing to do and perform whatever K should desire. Even if it were to be 24/7, four weeks, of lock-up and denial, I'm going the distance as her subbie. I'm sure of one thing. I will have enjoyment with K in one way or another. K simply likes lovemaking too much to do with out. Whether or not that means ORGASMS for me may be another story.

So, K just had her orgasm. She wanted more. I asked her if she wanted another orgasm. No. She wanted me. Hello!???!! I said……She wanted ME!!!!! She pulled me to her. She pulled me into position for entering. She said, "No! I want you. I want YOU!" She said this as I slid into her. AHHHH…so good! So wet. So warm. So tight. So engorged. So wonderful! We made love there, but shortly, K wanted me to enter from behind and rolled over onto her knees. I entered her pussy there and made love to her more. Then old age kicked in!!!! Yep, I lost it. I wilted. Grrrrr! I wanted this orgasm. It had been five days since my last and I wanted this one, dammit. I went and got some viagra and quickly came back to bed. I knew that on an empty stomach, it would not take long to recover. Laying there, loving, with in ten minutes, things started happening. I got my erection back. K decided to get on top and ride me. And, she did.

She rolled me to my back and climbed on. She directed her cock into her still wanting pussy and began to move up and down. Now, of course, I love this position. I get to see her fantastic figure. I get to caress her breasts. I get to hold her in in any manner I please. I can hold her by the neck as she is riding me (K likes this!)!! I caress her and do all the above. K takes me by the neck too (which I love too) and rides me orgasm. It was good. Now, I must admit that it was not an over the top orgasm this time, but as all men know, there is no such thing as a bad one. After the height of passion was complete, we cuddled. K then said she had to get up for work. I went to sleep soundly.

As K was finishing readying for work, she came and woke me. "Where is Kali?" I told her it was in the car. She went to get the black bag that all our toys are in. She gave me hairclip and said I needed to put it on. I asked what happened to Kali. She said that because I was still sleeping, she would use Hairclip instead. Isn't she so sweet. K knows I don't sleep well in Kali. Locked in Hairclip, We kissed good bye.

K left for work.

I went to back to sleep with a smile on my face.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Crashing, Denied

K and I got back from our trip Sunday night. It was a little late, I had to unpack, and get to bed: I had to get up at 4:15am to get ready for work the next morning. We crashed at my house, cuddling up to nurse to sleep.

Monday, during the daily grind, I had time to text with K some. We discussed my gift of being her "subbie" for two weeks or a month. The end result was that she could start over with it, starting Monday for a fresh four weeks. This was in part due to our lives having been too busy to really even take advantage of it. So it's official, I am a subbie until April 4th.

I got home from work and made a quick trip to the gym for a workout. I was back home at 7:30pm and K was there soon after. Since the weather had cooled some, we enjoyed dinner (sushi and wine) in front of the fireplace. We then started a little loving. K took the tie from my robe and collared me with it, which provides a leash also. She led me to the fireplace area, where we had an air mattress already ready on the floor. She laid down on the mattress and pulled me to her. We cuddled, caressed, and kissed different parts of each other. She pulled me toward her breasts, making me stop short by a few inches, took one in hand and teased me with it, not letting me touch, lick, or suck it. I was crazy with desire, stopped short, only able to look at her wonderful breasts. She then gently took me to her breast and nursed me for a short while.

Next she started moving me to her pussy, slowly, stopping me along the way to pay attention to places along away. At her pussy, I began to lick and suck her clit. K then changed positions, rolling me to my back and getting on top and putting her pussy in my face. I ate her pussy there for a little bit. I was sure I would be allowed to bring her to orgasm at this position. K stopped.

She got up and put me on my knees, bending over the mattress, and told me to stay there. She retrieved her paddle and started spanking me. K started lightly and slowly, warming me up. After I was nicely pink, she started in a little harder and faster. It was starting to warm up pretty good. K then stopped and loved on me some, caressing me and my ass. Next, some more whacks. Then stopping she caressed me some more. She then moved between my legs and played with her dick and balls. Mind you, I am still locked in Hairclip. She fondled them, teased them, licked them, and sucked them. We BOTH like that. She spanked me one more time, much harder, until I was collapsed on the mattress, whining for the intensity. Again she stopped and I got back on my knees as before and she loved on me again, giving me the pleasant ball treatment, caressing my ass, back, and chest. She moved on top of me laying on me, rubbing her pussy on my back and ass. I felt her warmth. I felt her wet pussy lips pressing to me. I felt her breasts brushing across me. It was all good.

I then made request to use the new whip I had bought for her. It was a leather cat o' nine. I had bought it off of It was only $7.60, shipping included. What a bargain. K obliged me and started to swing it carefully, since we had not as of yet used this one. She started lightly, gradually increasing force, as I indicated to her if it was okay or not. Soon she was making it whoosh through the air like a pro. It was stinging pretty good and I was too wrapped up in the sensation to indicate whether I could take more or not. K continued. She built intensity slowly from there. This all did not last long. K inspected my ass and said that it was nicely red and had a few light whelps. She then motioned for me to get up and we were heading for th bedroom. Asking me what I thought of the whip, I said that it was interesting and good. I also said that she was light with it, that she didn't really do that much. She said, "Really??? Come here!", as she pulled on the leash.

K took me to the couch and said, "Bend over there. I show what I can do. Let's see if you think this is light. Let's see if you think I can do more or not!" I bent over the couch, still standing (like a good little subbie). She began again with the whip. Harder this time. Then harder. And harder. It was singing pretty good. It was STINGING pretty good too. She was working on it. I started to whine a little. She stopped to inspect my as again and said that I was whelped pretty good. "Now, how was that?" she asked. I said that it was much more intense and rubbed my ass, both soothing the stinging and feeling for how much the whelps were evident. She chuckled and we went to the bedroom. K unlocked me and we cleaned up a bit got in bed.

While in bed, I commented to her that I was surprised that she didn't want to finish getting her orgasm. She replied, "Who said I wasn't?"

I said, "Oh, okay." K then pulled me to her breasts and I nursed. That's the last thing we remember. We fell asleep quickly, still tired from the trip.

It was a good night. We had good sushi by the fireplace. I got to be her collared subbie. We had some good lovemaking, sans orgasms. We had a spanking/whipping session. We nursed to sleep with me being very horny and denied. I believe this is the first time I have ever been actually denied deliberately. Wow! That was an experience.

Tuesday morning, I inspected my ass. No apparent damage. No apparent markings from the fun the night before. No presence of sensation left from it all. Apparently, I was unscathed.

Oh well, better luck next time!

Sunday, March 6, 2011

A Fun Day Monday

We had a fun time Monday. I am on vacation and have been enjoying the time off and relaxation. We had spent the night at K's house and slept in that morning. When I awoke, K was already up and not in the bedroom. I crawled out of bed and went to find her. She was in the living room doing some of her paperwork for her occupation. I came in, kissed,IOnd hugged her good morning. We enjoyed coffee and K finished up her papers. Meanwhile, I got out my laptop and started doing a little writing on the previous postings I've done.

As I relaxed on the couch writing, K got dressed and ready to leave for work. She informed me that I needed to get locked up. I teased her by whining that I was on vacation and that I should get a break from locking too. She said, "No, you need to lock it up," and pulled out Kali. She then locked Kali on her dick for safe keeping, kissed me goodbye and left. I remained on the couch, typing away. I had a lot to write and was going to be there a while. The writing juices were flowing.

After about an hour K returned from work to stop in for a few minutes. Sometimes she gets to do that, depending on where her job duties have demanded her attention. She came in and found me there on the couch. I was still in my robe. K came to me as I reclined there and started to play. She kissed me passionately. I mean PASSIONATELY!!!!…..using lots of tongue. WOW! She hadn't kissed me like that in a while. I could feel the passion, at the same time feeling a little tease. She then moved to my nipples. She sucked on them hard, giving me lots of strong sensations that make me squirm and my toes curl. (Did I mention that I had put down the laptop!) She moved farther down slowly, kissing and caressing, teasing. By now, her dick was painfully attempting full alertness! I groaned in the ecstasy of it all.

She made her way all the way down to her dick. She then began to fondle balls and caressing her dick. Oh My Goodness. It felt so good. I was enjoying it all. (Did I mention I was wearing Kali! You can refer to the pictures at the bottom of the page if you are not familiar with the name.) Kali was NOT liking all the attention K's dick was receiving. The dick loved it, Kali did not! The more the dick loved it, the angrier Kali got. As K's dick stood up to attention, acknowledging the caresses K was giving it, Kali bit in. The spikes of Kali are rounded somewhat, so as not to cause any piercing damage. However, Kali can hurt like hell. I began to squirm a little. I was enjoying everything K was doing. It felt so good. K then began to suck on her dick. DAAAAAMN! THAT FELT GOOD!

As K sucked, licked and caressed, her dick became more and more hard, becoming more and more painful, as Kali bit harder and harder. Those teeth of Kali were getting almost unbearable. K continued. It continued to feel better and better. Harder and harder! Biting harder and harder. And so the vicious cycle continued. As it did, I moaned louder and louder. I did not want K to stop, at the same time, barely being able to stand the "torment". When it becomes intense, I cannot even hardly move because of the pain. With any move of my legs or hips, it causes muscles and blood flow in K's dick to change. This causes flexing of tissue in the dick. This is excruciating. The "problem" is that every time K licks, squeezes, or sucks, it causes the same effect, or worse; worse being that it causes somewhat involuntary contractions of DICK muscles. These contractions are the most painful of all. At times I will even some what scream for the pain, though not at my full volume scream.

During the whole time of tease that K is doing, I am at varying degrees of pain, the most being when she sucks harder on her dick, which pulls more blood flow in, which in turns causes an increase in penile size and hardness. At one point, I was reduced to a whispering whimper, breathing fast, trying to compensate for the pain. I could not fend her off if I had too. I pleaded softly for her to stop! It was all I could muster. She continued!!! It was WONDERFUL!!!!! I wondered if there would actually be holes pierced throughout the skin, regardless of the teeth of Kali being dulled.

K continued to tease, sucking, stroking her dick, sometimes taking her balls in hand, pulling and squeezing them too. It was truly fantastic. I had never experienced anything this extremely intensely pleasurable, yet so painful at the same time. The pain had two effects: I loved it, being very erotic, yet it was terribly painful, which of course, as stated before, hurt like hell! Add to that the wonderful loving K was doing to me with all the soft and firm attentions to her dick, it was an exquisite, over the top, indescribable pleasure/pain, paradoxical experience! This continued for maybe 30 minutes, I lost all association with time. K finally eased off, reaching for her keys, she unlocked Kali from her dick.

K took her dick and loved on it. She kissed it and inspected it for just how much damage may have been done. Hmmmm…..There was a comment that it looked somewhat like a colander!!! HA! She loved on it a little more and then took me to the bedroom. K was horny. "Tormenting" me by teasing her dick while wearing Kali really turns her on. Of COURSE I was horny too. It was all pleasure. When we arrived at the bed, we laid down and K moved me to her pussy, and it wasn't her dick she wanted at the moment! She wanted me to EAT her pussy. I was happy to oblige. Being locked in Kali and being teased like that, makes me so horny. Even more than that though, it creates huge desire in me to eat her pussy. It is more important to me than being in her, than my own orgasm. It's all I want. I want to taste her pussy juices, to smell her, to feel her wetness on my face and her pussy lips pressed to my lips. Oh Yes!!! I gladly went down. I was not disappointed. She was wet. She smelled good, having the aromas of being turned on, hot and horny. And, so I ate. Ahhhh…. so good.

And K came!!!!!!!

By all appearances, it was a good one for her. I loved it.

Immediately, K wanted her dick. I was happy to oblige that desire (big smile). I entered her. I did not last long, of course. I have said this before, but this was one of the best, best, best orgasms of my life. Powerful. It was one of those loud, strong, growling, grunting, moaning, draining orgasms. K had built me up for one of the most powerful of my life. My eyes rolled back in my head, and my heart stopped for about 15 beats. My jaw dropped to the bed, while I was still upright on my knees!!! My toes curled so hard that I could feel them scratch the back of my head!!!

Yep, It was GOOOOD!!!

K locked me back up and left to do more of her work.

I reclined on the couch and smiled. I typed more, and smiled. I reflected and smiled. I smiled. I eventually left her house and smiled. I smiled the rest of the day. And night.

I still smile!!!

Saturday, March 5, 2011

K and I are on a trip into Kentucky to see her family. Traveling, talking, visiting with her relatives, we are enjoying the trip. Being so busy, it has not allowed for having time for posting anything new. I have a good story to tell, but it will be later before I have the time to put it together. K is keeping me locked some of the time while on the trip, which is unusual. Most of the time when we are together, I am usually unlocked.

We arrived at our destination last night. K and I have not had much time for sex, but have maintained our nursing anyway. Last night, we MADE time. It was late and we were tired from the travel. We went to bed at midnight. We nursed, I ate her pussy to her having a good orgasm, had sex with me having a great orgasm, and cuddled up, me nursing, went to sleep. Ahhh… sweet rest.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

The Promised Saturday Story

Okay, here is the Saturday story, as promised.

K and I went to a Mardi Gras parade, went out to eat and were home about 9:30pm. We went to the bathroom and freshened up. Or course, this included getting naked and comfortable in house robes. While washing at the sink, still totally naked, K brought the paddle and lightly spanked my ass, causing it to only slightly sting. When we were both ready and in our robes, K then motioned for me to come closer. She took the waste tie from my robe and tied it around my neck to form a collar and leash. YES!!!! I have wanted her to do this to me. I had confessed in an Earlier Posting that I have had a fetish for being collared. She leaned over and took the paddle in hand and led me to the living room. There, she motioned for me to get on my knees and then to bend over, laying on the big ottoman. She then lifted my robe over my back and started to spank me lightly again.

This was going to be a different spanking session from any previous, I could tell. We had both already learned so much in our previous sessions. This time K warmed me up some. She took it easy on me at first, spanking lightly as I lay there on the ottoman. Ah yes, it was good. After my ass was nicely pinkish red, she began to swing a little harder. These stung pretty good. We had been playing a game for the past few days. I am always teasing K that my dick is so small, often times holding up my fingers about two inches apart, indicating how pitifully small I am. (feel free to reference pictures below to see for yourself and make your own judgements.) K now has been telling me, every time I make such a tease, that it is now ten more swats added in the next spanking session. This has accumulated to 40 or 50: I lost track.

When she begins to give me the harder swats, she tells me to start counting them for her. I chuckle and begin. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10! She then stopped, laid down the paddle and began loving on me, but not in a sexy erotic way. It was in a caring, loving, care-taking way. It was so sweet. She told me that it was all okay, that it was good to get spanked, that she loved me very much, that I needed this spanking. You see, I told her previously that I needed her to tell me it was okay, that I should cry, that I needed to let go, that I needed to break down my walls and let out the pain accumulated over years. I had told her that I needed her to encourage me to cry, and to make me know that I was "safe". Being safe is a special thing for us. It means that we are safe to share ourselves deeply without being judged, demeaned, or looked down upon. It is an important place to be, to be safe, to know that you can show who you really are, deep inside. K and I have used "safe" terminology ever since we met. It is one thing that we "get" about each other.

After K loved and assured me, she resumed spanking. Another several swats and she again loved on me and comforted me. It was working. I was feeling the emotional walls come down. This continued until about 50 had been counted. She then again comforted me, loving me, caressing my red ass (smile). Many of the swats had been strong. They had left their "presence". I would feel them for a while. K did such a good job with it all, spanking and loving me the whole time. At no time did it feel like punishment or anger. It ALL felt like love. During it all, I could feel the sense of weeping coming up in me. K did not comment about that, but I'm sure she could sense it in my voice as I counted the swats, getting more soft in my voice, more humble, and more emotional. Now she quit.

K motioned for me to get up with a soft tug on my collar. Standing, we held each other, my heart melting as we embraced in such an emotional state of love. It was exquisite. Using the bathroom and talking, K said she wanted a turn. She had previously mentioned that she might like being spanked too. I said, "Now?" She said yes. I took her to the ottoman and motioned for her to kneel and loved on her as she bent over. I raised her rob and caressed her ass. I cuddled beside her as she lay there on the ottoman. I talked softly to her, telling her that she needed to be spanked too. She needed me to show her love in this way too. I told her that I was going to spank her now and show her that I love her so very much. To each thing I told her, she became humble and nodded, affirming that she did indeed desire and need to be spanked too.

I started softly. I am a strong guy. Unfortunately, I do not know my own strength. I told K that I was going to be careful, starting very softly, and build from there, asking her for feedback, not wanting to overdo it. She nodded. With each increase in force, I asked her how it was. Finally, at a point sufficient, she said that it was hard enough. Often times, I came to her, laying down the paddle, and showed her my love. I caressed her butt, soothing the stinging pain, telling her how much I loved her, that she was safe, that she was okay, that it was all okay. She took it all in. She accepted my love. She accepted the spanking, apparently enjoying it. After a little bit, with her ass nicely pink, she said it was enough. I took her into my arms and loved on her more.

K then had to go take care of some clothes in the washer. When she returned, I had laid back over the ottoman. She came to me and asked sweetly, "Do you need some more, Sweetheart?" I nodded yes. She said, "Awwww…okay." She got the paddle and began again to spank me. I needed it. She knew it. She spanked hard, my ass already being warmed up properly. She resumed the same routine, spanking, loving, back and forth. She added to it, also telling me I was safe. It was all I needed, and all I needed to hear. I started to cry. She spanked a little more, talking to me softly, telling me it was all okay. I crumbled. I wept sweetly there on the ottoman while she came to me, caressing me, loving me, telling me to let it all out. I cried there in her arms, weeping, soaking up her love. After crying there with her, we moved to the bedroom.

We made passionate love. We were now both ready and primed for over-the-top love making. And it was. We nursed. I ate her pussy to a most excellent orgasm. We caressed and kissed. I entered her pussy and we made love WHILE we had sex! I had a most excellent orgasm myself!!! It was wonderful, sharing passion with each other. Afterward, we cleaned up again and cuddled up for the night, with me nursing sweetly at her breasts. We nicely, closely drifted to sleep.

This has GOT to be the best lovemaking in my whole life.

And that, my friends, is the Saturday story.

(Can't stop smiling about it)

Monday, February 28, 2011

Hurting, Couldn't Sleep, and Healing Again

Having started this post in the previous one, getting off on another track, and feeling that what was said in it should be captured in it's own post, I left off there with indeed capturing the relevance to our Thursday Night action. Now, I can continue.

Friday night, we were busy. We live in the deep south. Here, the area celebrates Mardi Gras exquisitely, yet not quite in the style of New Orleans. K and I had tickets to a Mardi Gras ball and attended it until 1:30am. Early in the ball, formalities were being done, while non-Mardi-Gras-association-attendees are required to remain off of the main floor for the association's festivities. K and I sat together in the box seats waiting for Tableau to complete. While we were there I was feeling very Twitterpated. I told K some things about spanking that I wanted her to know. I told her how it meant very much to me and that it made me feel very close to her emotionally. I wanted her to spank me more, whenever she wanted to, without reservation, as hard or as soft as she wanted, as long as she wanted, with total trust between us for EACH other. I surrendered all reserve to her, for her to use her own judgement, and unless it came to a point of undeniable ability for me to take any more, I would not complain nor try to instruct her in proper ways to apply her spanking finesse. And again, if I could feel the results the next day, or more, it would be wonderful. She took it all in, smiling. She asked if I was sure about that. Was I sure I really wanted what I said I wanted? I smiled and said yes, I want it all, and I want to give you all control, trusting you to use your judgement.

How Sweet It Is!

We spent the night at the ball, dancing, drinking, and dining, having a good time. We arrived home at about 2:00am, showered, and cuddled up. K wanted me to hold her. I wrapped my arms around her, spooning. In a few minutes she rolled over, laying her head on my chest and quickly went to sleep. Unnnnnnh!!! I felt left out. I felt distanced and ignored. It seriously hurt my feelings. Why? K always nurses me to sleep. I almost always am held in her arms, to her breasts and "suckle" as we will both drift into comfortable sleep together. Yes, I know she was tired. Yes, she does sometimes do it this way, cuddling up with her head on my chest, going to sleep. This was a little different to me though. It FELT like I was being left in the cold. Was it real? No, but it felt that way. Then to top it off, I could not sleep. Now it was 2:30, K is sleeping soundly, and I am wide awake. I then realize that my heart rate is accelerated, even though I am doing nothing but laying there. This is a very common thing to happen when I have had MSG in something I have eaten. Evidently some of the food at the ball had been seasoned heavily with MSG! My heart was beating hard and fast. I could not sleep. I was feeling lonely and forgotten. It was feelings that were actually conjured from my first marriage when I really WAS neglected.

After laying there for nearly three hours, tossing, turning, surfing the net on my cell phone, trying to sleep, miserable, I did finally start to drift off to sleep. K was still sound asleep. She was sleeping hard. She was actually snoring some; sometimes letting out louder snores. As I drifted off, she let out a loud one. Boing! Wide awake again. Drifting off again. SNORE! BOING!!! Wide awake again. You get the picture. I finally got up, emotionally hurting, miserable, tired, and went to the living room. I curled up on the couch, covered up with a throw, and pouted to sleep. I had NEVER done this before with K.

Pitiful Huh!?!???? (laughing about this now)

I slept there a couple of hours when K came and woke me up, asking why I was on the couch. I told her I couldn't sleep, that MSG had gotten me again. She took me back to bed and we cuddled up there. My wonderfully perceptive K could tell there was something wrong though. She asked. I then told her that I was hurt, feeling ignored and forgotten, and lonely, explaining the mental connections to a hurtful past. K also told me that her arthritis had been hurting her, so when we had arrived home from the ball, she had taken some prescription medicine for it which also contained some narcotic pain relief. I understood this as she explained it, realizing that it had caused her to go to sleep more quickly and soundly than usual. We discussed it all well, in a short amount of time. She understood my emotional state too. She got it. She took me and comforted me as I broke down and cried in her arms. Yeah, as big and tough (250 pounds 6'1" of "all man") and hard as I can be, I am a tenderhearted baby on the inside. K knows this and knew how to take care of me.

She took me and held me close, holding me to her breasts. This is the best place to comfort me. K is well aware of the power she has in her breasts to melt my heart, to make me feel better, to make me feel loved, to make my world all better. She took her breast and put her nipple in my mouth and I nursed there, taking in her love as she talked sweetly to me, caressing me, loving me, holding me, pouring out her care. After a little while of this, having adequately comforted my heart, I warmed up to her even more. Then things heated up!

Nursing ALWAYS turns K on. She got wet. She got horny. Well, okay, I did too. I got hard. I got drippy. We were getting quite excited. Then wonderful things happened. K pulled me on top of her. I kissed her mouth and a special place on her neck that she loves. That place on her neck really gets her going. Soon, she was pushing me down. Down I went. I ate her pussy, loving every drop of wetness. She tasted so good. She smelled wonderful. I was totally eating this up (pun intended!). She came, and came good! Pulling me up, I entered her and began to stroke in and out, deeper and deeper. She then wanted me to enter her pussy from behind and we moved to THE position, with her on her hands and knees. Oh YES!!! That went very well for me! I came and we collapsed side by side in bed. After a little clean-up, (sorry folks, it was with a wash cloth) we cuddled up again, and while nursing, we went back to sleep. We woke up at about 11:30, all in all getting a decent amount of rest. Life was good again.

This is how it is with K and I. We don't go very long with hurt between us. Healing wounds between us is important. Our love is too special to tolerate anything of that sort. We really are one of those soulmate relationships!

Well, it doesn't look like I'm going to get to the Saturday night story in this post either. Okay, I promise, the next post will be ALL about Saturday Night!

Deeper Into The Thursday Night Experience

Thursday Night proved to be a difficult learning experience. It actually took a couple of days to recover from it, even though K and I discussed and reconciled our issues Thursday and Friday. Friday, we did talk more about the experience and agreed that we would like to try spanking some more (my heart leaps for joy!).

I am finding that some things we try become important to us as part of who we are. Spanking was a fun thought to me in the past, a fantasy. A couple of sessions, a week and a half ago, had been good experiences. Thursday night, though fraught with problems, was still a good experience. While touching on Thursday night, I should probably insert a little information here. Ever since the first spanking session, and before, I had told K that I wanted her to spank me hard enough so that I would remember it the next day or so. What I mean is that I wanted to FEEL it the next day, still carrying results on my ass. I wanted to feel the presence of SOME kind of lasting presence of the spanking she was to lovingly bestow on my derriere. Thursday, was definitely an answer to that. I did feel it all the next day. It was wonderful. K had done exactly what I asked for. There was a little tingle all day long and I could feel that there was some lasting marks, both superficial and not so much so. K had tried her best to oblige me, to give me what I had wanted. She had even commented to that effect: she was only trying to give me that effect. It was one reason that it upset her, that she had tried her best, and it seemed to her that all I did was complain about it. This was an issue for us concerning Thursday night's session, and one I profusely apologized for to her. I love this woman, and I know beyond any doubt that she would not intentionally try to hurt me, whether emotionally or physically. The spanking she was doing Thursday night was multi-faceted; K trying to give me what I had asked for, K trying to be careful, K doing it all in a deep sense of love and vulnerability, and me trying to give feedback for what was working and not.

I was going to continue with this post to tell about a wonderful time we had Saturday night. Changing my mind, it will be the subject of a future post.

Spanking is a Delicate Thing

We continue to explore the spanking possibilities and how to incorporate it into our love making. It has been something that K and I have had to work on to get right, and that is still in developmental stages, with great progress.

Thursday night, K had another little session. We were in the bedroom at her house, getting ready for bed. I was already laying on the bed (hoping for a little spanking). K came to bed and fetched the paddle. We had mentioned that the "best" place to spank was probably kneeling over the big ottoman in her living room, or at least bent over the bed. This would probably give the best positioning for the proper application of leather to ass.

I however, was laying ON the bed, on my stomach. We proceeded anyway, which was ok with me. I found that it was much more intense. I had to tell K that the angles needed changed, don't strike quite so high, that might be too hard at that particular place on my butt, and so on. The laying on the bed obviously was making it more difficult for K to know exactly where to apply the paddle.

Now, I know you might think that I was doing too much in the way of trying to control the situation, but it needs to be understood what the damage CAN be by this particular paddle. It is very heavy, for a paddle of this sort. I think that I have a fairly high level of pain tolerance (K says that I do, if I want to). I actually enjoy the spanking when it is right. Why? I will explain that later. While laying completely prone, her angle of application had a tendency to be straight down. This was putting forces to the wrong places of the anatomy. It felt like it was compressing the buttocks into the body in such a way that it was bruising down in the muscle. I also felt it in my tail bone, with compression of inner tissue, to the point that it could bruise dangerous places internally. The overall effect was not only the pain, but was to cause a genuine concern in me for possibly more serious injury.

With this in mind, I drew my knees up under me somewhat to expose more of the bottom of my bottom. So now, I am positioned with my ass in the air and my chest still on the bed. K continued to spank, with force. In this position, now my butt was stretched tight. This gave the effect of causing a hardened ass, with very little give. So now, the spanking was more abrupt causing more of a jar to the spine, even seeming to be bruising muscle tissue in that area against the pelvis boney area.

With all this in mind, it did hurt. It stung. It was felt deeply. Although it was having a good effect on my heart, it didn't finish as we would have preferred. I had told K the day before, after some spanking, that if she had kept at it, I would probably have broken down and cried, letting out pent up emotion, and feeling a cleansing effect. That was the direction we were headed this night, but with all the detrimental circumstances of me laying on the bed, it caused me to shut down instead of opening up. K sensed it. After we were finished with it for the night, I commented that it may have been too hard of a spanking, considering all things. This upset her. She felt that she wasn't able to get anything right. I had to actually comfort her and tell her that I was only trying to give her feedback, since we were only starting to learn about it all. We had quite a discussion about it, both of us shedding some tears. After all was said and done, she understood the circumstances, and I understood that I must not give her "too much" feedback.

It is a delicate thing we are undertaking. Spanking is an enjoyable activity for us both. At the same time, it makes both of us vulnerable because we are actually sharing deep emotions with each other. It is turning out to be precious. I believe we will both enjoy it more as we progress.

Saturday night, we had another session. Ahh…but that is the subject of another post.

Just know, it was all good!

(Smiling, with deep love in my heart for K)

Friday, February 25, 2011

The Anal and Spanking Story, part 3

We had been to the local toy store (Part 2) and headed home.

When we arrived home it was late, nearly midnight. We had burned up a lot of time at the store. Having perspired some at dance, we both got showers. Then it was time to play. We got out the toys and cleaned and sanitized them thoroughly. We sure didn't want anyone else's cooties. We started with nursing a little while. As usual, this made K horny. She got wet very quickly, part of which is due to all the toy store fun we had and the anticipation. She moved me to eat her pussy. After eating some, she reached for the new egg vibe. She switched to the wivibe. Soon she had an orgasm and decided it was my turn.

We cuddled for a little bit then K wanted the new paddle. The paddle is heavy and has metal studs in it that adds even more weight. I told K that she would have to be careful with it working her way up with force. She did. She started out light, getting the feel of the paddle and my response to it. She quickly worked it up. It wasn't long, within a few strokes, that she knew just how much I could take. Wow! That thing packs a wallop. I could tell K wasn't swinging very hard, yet the weight did the job. I was soon squirming, sometimes letting out little yelps. Sometimes K would pause between swings about three seconds, and then sometimes use rapid fire. The rapid ones were intense. With the slower paced ones, I had time to recoil and get ready for the next. To finish up, K gave a longer series of harder, faster, rapid fire swats. It was so intense that it was touching me deeply. Just as she stopped, I was about to break into tears. I was almost at the point to start crying openly, letting out my emotions.

Yes, it is an emotional experience. I described in "Part 1" how that it "equalizes" me with K. Tonight, again, I find the same response. Even more so. This was an even more intense spanking session, the presence of the paddle adding to it. During the spanking, K oft times told me she love me, stopping to soothe my butt with her hand, before resuming the spanking. It was a glorious experience, wrapped in love and emotion. I succumbed to her. I was laying down all my reserves and breaking down walls to allow her in this close to me. After the spanking was done, I felt as close as Thursday night, maybe more.

I later told K that I wished she had continued the session a little longer, that I had almost started crying. To me that is a good thing. I consider crying a good thing. It lets me release pent up frustration, hurts, and anger. If I were to start crying, it would allow me to destroy walls and let K into my heart even farther than she is now. It would build the bond between us even greater than it presently is. K was very thoughtful of this and I think that next time she may well spank until I am sobbing in her arms. That would be the absolute best outcome of all.

Next came the anal toy pictured above. We followed directions that I received on Chastity Forums and from some helpful comments on a previous blog. We lubed it up well with some water-based lube and went slowly. Turning on the incorporated vibrator helped a lot. It made relaxing much easier. How did it feel? It felt like a vibrating probe placed in my ass! (laughing) Actually, it felt good. It was of course unusual to me, but I could see where it might have possibilities. K used the probe on me, searching for the best spot for pleasurable sensations. After a little of this play, I asked K to get on top, which she did, riding me to a very good orgasm. It ranked right up there with some of my best.

I suppose because, we did shower first, used lots of lube and was careful, it wasn't a bad experience. At one place, while K was inserting the probe, there was some pain, but that was quickly remedied and on we went. I previously had been concerned with smell and mess from playing this way, but it was ok. There was actually very little smell or mess at all. The vibrations did excite and add to my orgasm. I can see where we may very well experiment with anal play. Will it be something we use often? I don't know. Will it be something we use in the future at all, after we decide just what we do think of it. I don't know. That decision has obviously not been made yet. We will continue to experiment I'm sure. Either way, it will have been worth the while.

Time will tell.

Thanks to all who offered helpful information.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

The Anal and Spanking Story, part 2

Friday was a continuation of Thursday Night.

K and I went dancing Friday night. During the dance, K mentioned that she needed a new vibrator. Her Purple Friend had bit the dust. PF is a necessity at times. Sometimes, K can't seem to have an orgasm, no matter how much effort we put into it. Then, only PF will do the job. No PF, sometimes no orgasms, and severe frustration for K. There is a "toy store" up the road about five minutes away. Turns out that it closes at midnight. K and I agree that we will leave the dance when it ends and will go peruse the vibrator department of the toy store.

Arriving at the store, we went upstairs where the toys are kept. At the dance, I mentioned to K, that in light of last night's spanking, she may need more spanking implements. She smiled. The first thing we came to was the whips and paddles. We looked them over and investigated the ramifications of each. Many of the whips had accoutrements that we feared would damage skin too much if used to forcefully and for too long. We settled on an apparently well made leather paddle. It was heavy and stiff. It was K's choice. I told her to pick the one she liked the most. The paddle won.

As we turned to look at vibes, something shiny caught my eye. K continued toward the vibes. I stopped. K did not see what I was doing. When I turned to see what was shiny, I realized it was a metal collar with a neoprene lining. It was designed to fasten closed, secured by a small lock. Ooooh….! This tickled my fancy. I have had a fetish for being collared ever since I have known about such a thing. I picked up the collar and put it around my neck and closed it up, yet with no lock to fasten. I then turned to K and showed her. She laughed and said to I should put it back. I laughed and left it on, walking around the small room shopping. I stopped at the little cashier's desk where a couple of ladies were looking over stuff under the glass and talking with the attendant. We all had quite a conversation. I asked about Chastity Devices. Out they came. They had a CB-6000 and a 7 Gates of Hell. The ladies were surprised, shocked, curious, and amazed. We discussed them. The attendant said that she knows of other CDs she has seen. One of them had little spikes in it so if the man gets hard, it pokes into him, making him not want to get hard. I smiled and replied that I was wearing one. She looked at me and smiled, and said good, that's a good man. We all laughed as I could hear K chuckling in the background. The two other ladies simply listened in disbelief. I ended up getting in quite a conversation with the attendant about chastity and the related fun.

The conversation took a turn when I mentioned an interest and intrigue of anal play. K had rejoined me and attendant lady sang anal praises. Informing her that I have NEVER even considered such a thing until lately, I asked her what would be a good toy to get started with. Went over to the small anal play section. There she pointed out an anal toy that would be a good start. It provided for about four inches of insertion and had a vibrator incorporated in it. It was made of a very soft flexible silicone. I turned to K and said, "Well for $27.00, it might be worth a try to experiment with it. If I don't like it, we can trash it." Along with the paddle, in goes the anal toy to be included with our purchase. We then looked at vibrators with the help of the attendant. We ended up selecting two: a wivibe and an egg that resembled K's PF. A bottle of cleaner included, we purchased and left. It's time to go home and try out our new stuff!

And try it out we did!

Continued in The Anal and Spanking Story, part 3.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

The Anal and Spanking Story, part 1

It started Thursday.

I had bought K a cute little crop for Christmas. Instead of the usual loop of leather at the end, it has a pink oval-shaped pussy-cat face fixture. We've played a little with it since I gave it to her, but nothing much; just a few wacks here and there, on either of us.

Thursday night, I guess it was time for more. The "pussy whip" was laying on the kitchen table (isn't it nice when the kids are grown and you don't have to hide everything?) innocently. I picked it up and playfully swatted K on the butt a couple of times. She jumped and laughed, while I investigated the pussy face print on her ass. Yep, there was definitely an imprint. She then got ahold of the crop and printed my ass up with a few swats. Wow! I loved it!

We migrated to the living room. K has a big chair with a big ottoman. It is almost big enough to call a loveseat, with the ottoman being matched to it. I laid back on the ottoman and waited on her to come from the kitchen. When she did, she touched me lovingly, holding the pussy-whip (PW) in the other hand. She then told me to turn over.

Let me back up slightly. K had a birthday earlier in the week. I treated her to dinner and dancing at a fine restaurant, coffee at one of our favorite coffee shops, chocolates, and lingerie from Victoria's Secret. That evening, I also told her that as another gift, I was going to give her a month of being her subbie. This meant that I was to be at her disposal for any pleasure she desired. Now, it didn't have any connotations of being her house slave, cleaning, cooking, and all that. It was more along the line of being her sex slave, ready to eat her pussy at any time, being denied if she desired, and anything else she could consider wanting in the line of sexual fantasy, play, and fulfillment. I offered this gift to expire on the same day of her birthday in March. She said that she only wanted it for two weeks instead. I said okay, if that's what she wants, two weeks it is (whew!). The next day, she did say that she might want to extend and accept it to the full month, depending. I said ok, maybe: after all, she made the modification, changing it to two weeks.

Okay, back to the story. As a good subbie, I complied, rolling over on my stomach on the ottoman. She then scooted my hips back so that my legs bent down to the floor. This posed me in a position of kneeling on my knees and bent over the ottoman, a perfect spanking position. She then proceeded to use the PW. She spanked me, turning my ass a bright read. With many of the swats, she would giggle, apparently enjoying the session, and enjoying reddening me arse. K commented that my ass was getting whelped up a little bit. That didn't stop her though. She would pause a little, inspect my ass, rub it a little, then spank some more. Some of them stung pretty good; okay, a lot! I could hear PW whipping through the air with most every swat. Each landed with a thwack as the rod and pussy face landed on it's mark.

I loved it.

K appeared to love it.

I loved it that K loved it.

K then had to go to the kitchen to take a prepared dish from the oven. I just stayed right where I was. She returned soon, PW in hand. She then proceeded to whip my ass some more. It wasn't long though until she was done. She then rubbed it softly again, soothing the redness and whelps. Wow! What a woman! Those that enjoy spanking will most likely relate to what I say next.

This is the first time K has ever really spanked me. I had casually mentioned it to her before, and that I thought I would like it. The thought of it turned me on. I had seen some of the videos that had been posted on the Serving B blog. The thought of being spanked so much excited me. I will say though, I'm not so sure that I want my ass quite so worked over as that, even though it is a thought. And, if K liked it, I would let her wear my ass out as much as she wanted too. I have commented to her a few times that sometimes I wish she would spank my ass such that I would feel it a few days, or at least all day!

The spanking was wonderful! When K was finished, I felt so close to her. I was so in love with her. I don't know why. I don't understand the mechanism. Don't ask me to figure it out. All I know is that after that spanking, I loved K more than ever. It endeared my heart to her more and stronger than ever before. I felt so madly in love with her. She spanked me in such a way that she showed me love. She even commented some of the time while spanking, that she loved me. It was profound. I really do love the spanking and the results I feel in my heart from it. I felt like K had given me a wonderful gift of love. I felt humbled by it. I felt like I was on the correct plane, where I should be. Us men have a nasty little habit of trying to be "one up" on everybody. Even if it is not "practiced" on everyone, the mentality is often times still there. That is the last place we should even start to think of ourselves with our loved one. I suppose the spanking puts me in the right mindset with K because it creates a pure honesty between us, creating equality in our hearts.

We moved to the bedroom and made love. Of course.

(Big Smile)

Monday, February 21, 2011

A Day Away From The Norm

Fresh Haircut

Yesterday, K and I were getting ready to take a day off from the norm. We had reservations at a resort only about 20 miles away for the night. We had cuddled, drank coffee, made love, with K having a good orgasm from pussy eating with use of a vibrator at the same time. We had showered and were in the process of getting ready. We had mentioned over the past week that both of us were in need of a fresh haircut. When we were getting ready to leave for the resort, we both agreed that we would like haircuts before we left. Out came the clippers. K went first, laying on the bed while I clipped away all hair from her wonderful pussy. She really did well this time. Last time she squirmed, shrieked, and guarded to the point that it was difficult to even get started. I guess I learned how to give it better and she did very well, laying there calmly as I completed the job.

Next, I again laid my butt on the bed and she hacked away at the hair that had grown out. It didn't take her long to complete the job. Above, you can see the result of her handiwork. We both showered again and continued with our preparations for the day, evening, and next morning.

We arrived at the resort. It was only going to be a one nighter because we both had to work Monday. She had to leave by 7:00am and I had to work that night (damn night shift!). K had also made reservations for the Sunday brunch at the resort restaurant. It was my first time there, but not K's. Wow! This place was wonderful. The food was all delicious, set up in somewhat of a buffet style, with elegance. We ate until we had even slightly overeaten. We enjoyed lounging at the pool for a while. I had not been able to nurse that morning and was really in need. K and I had our lounge chairs scooted close together where we could somewhat cuddle up while we relaxed. One thing led to another. I cuddled up to sweet K. I was longing for her breasts and moved my face to rest against them, enjoying the touch of her womanly skin, since we were wearing bathing suits (ah, the pleasures of living in the deep south). She cradled my head there and I relaxed, feeling comforted a little. It was not long though and I was moving her swimsuit out of the way discreetly making her nipple available for nursing. I snuggled in, taking her wonderful nipple into my mouth. I suckled there for a few minutes as she covered me with her arm to disguise the appearance as simply a man cuddling up to his lover in a benign loving embrace. It was all so discreet, yet it was amazingly wonderful. After nursing for a few minutes, I was relieved, having a need met in my heart for closeness. We carefully maneuvered to cover K's breast as I moved away. Oh my goodness, it was heaven on earth!

The resort we were at, was not one of which you could show such public displays of affection openly. So, we made do and made it work anyway. K is absolutely wonderful. She makes allowances for such situations if possible. She enjoys public intimacy as much as I do. Later that night, I explained to K that it really meant a lot to me that I was able to nurse by the pool. I really did need it badly. She smiled and said that she enjoyed it too. We BOTH needed the intimacy that nursing gives us. Yeah, we could have retired to our room then, instead of nursing by the pool, but the spontaneity was part of what made it so wonderful.

That evening, we strolled the grounds, enjoying the beauty of it all. We sat and enjoyed a glass of wine and talked. That is one thing that K and I do well: talk. We are both great communicators and enjoy discussing anything of interest. After the wine, we decided to go back to our room and nurse some more. To the room we went, with me being full of anticipation. We undressed and cuddled under the covers. I moved longingly to her breasts as she guided me to her nipple, taking her breast in her hand and placing it in my open mouth. I sweetly moaned as I took her in. It was soooooo good. I suckled there for a little while and K started getting horny. It wasn't long before she pulled me over on top of her. Shortly after that, she moved indicating that she wanted me to eat her pussy. I showed my appreciation, telling her how I wanted to eat it, giving her pleasures, fulfilling her need, taking care of her pussy. I asked if I could, if I could eat it her pussy, if she would allow me to go down on her and eat her to orgasm. With each second, she became more and more lusty for it and pushed me down. Aaaah…. her pussy was so good. I ate her and soon she came, HARD. She squeezed my head with her legs. She took my head in her hands and pulled my face into her pussy, harder than she has ever done before. She ground her pussy into my face and squeezed more with her legs. This is the thing that I live for! I love her orgasms, and this was the best ever, with her giving such forcefulness in pressing my face deep in her pussy folds. Afterward, we made love with me getting a wonderful orgasm too. We BOTH now had two orgasms for the day! Life is Grand!

We cleaned up and went to the lounge, eating appetizers, having a drink, and dancing the night away. Returning to our room, we went to bed quickly. K snuggled up to me and I wrapped my arms around her. She was laying on my chest. She turned her head slightly and began to suck on my nipple. Sweet! Occasionally, K likes to nurse too, at my nipples. She suckled for a little while and drifted off to sleep. I shifted a little to get more comfortable and she awakened. She was ready for me now, and I moved to her breasts, suckling, nursing, moaning, enjoying. Then we both drifted to sleep, wrapped in each other, suckling sweetly.

Friday, February 18, 2011

What Might You Do?

Have you ever wondered what you MIGHT do?

There are a few things I said I would never do. When I was growing up as a teenager, I wondered what in the world people could possibly see consider desirable in anal sex. This was basically rooted in the thought of a man penetrating a woman. What could a man get out of sticking his dick up a woman's poop hole!?!? The biggest detriment was simply the thought of fecal matter on my dick and the smell. Ewwww….YUCK! I have to say, it still holds no charm to me, neither does the thought of it enter into any of my fantasies.

In two marriages and a my wonderful girlfriend, K, when it came time to lay ground rules for lovemaking, one of the things I would lay down was that I played with no one's asshole, and no one is playing with mine. Even with K, whom I have known just over a year, I have always maintained the same rule.

Hmmmm….. How things change.

Lately, I have been intrigued by the thought of anal play. I suppose it is the oft mentioned practice in some of the chastity blogs I have read. It seems that it can be an enjoyable practice. Am I changing the rules? Well, it's a thought. Am I interested in exploring anal play? Well, that's a thought too. Would I be willing to incorporate it into our lovemaking? Hmmmm…..I might be willing to give it a try. I no longer rule it out.

K and I have been discussing it a little bit, lately. I'm finding the subject a little exciting now, thinking of having my anal areas explored. I think I would like to at least see what it is all about, to see if I am missing something. I'm thinking K may be interested in doing this to me too. She may be willing or wanting to accommodate me, using toys on my ass, to go down another road of discovery together.

We will see.

Ya know,….. I'm finding more all the time,…….I may even be kinkier than I originally thought!

(smiling….sort of)

Sunday, February 13, 2011

A GOYO????

K and I have adopted a term for her status as my KH. That term is GOYO. What the hell is a GOYO? It plays with the term Goddess. After we played with the label for a s while, me calling her my Goddess playfully, it developed farther. It was at a time when we were just beginning to explore male chastity together. I had told K before that I was willing to let her control my orgasms, saving them all for her. She was getting used to the idea. K then said that she was now my GOYO!

Goyo! Well, I had to ask, "What does that mean?"

K replied, "It means Goddess Of Your Orgasm."

Perfect. It was a playful term, an acronym for what our play was developing into. It stuck. Ever since adopting the term, K quickly assumed the role. With the label Goyo, she realized that she now did have control, with a title to verify it. And, she has taken that control ever since. She now decides what device I will wear every day. She keeps me locked all the time when out of her presence, and a lot of the time in her presence.

I must say, K is a wonderful Goyo. She keeps my orgasms controlled nicely. I am never out of her presence without some device locked on her dick. The control however, does not mean that she is denying me of orgasms. It only means that all my orgasms are with her. She loves sex. She loves her dick. She loves her dick being inside of her. She has no real intentions of denying me sexual pleasure or gratification. She DOES deny me of having said pleasure by myself. When either of us is horny, wanting lovemaking, wanting orgasms, we usually do our best to accommodate the other's need.

Feeling controlled. Having a Goyo. Enjoying lots of lovemaking with my Goyo. Meeting each other's needs. Ahhhhh….it's a wonderful life!